Wednesday, February 03, 2010

well. i m thinking that i shud really start using the book that jiaxuan got us. so i shall add in my first 3 writings soon. Zep 3, Phil 2, Col 3 and finally today, Luke 14:27.

Somehow or rather. I always go back to this. Throw it in with the song Gethsamane. Through the months of prayer and fasting. i felt God give me a burden for society. especially the youth to those approaching early adulthood who are in the midst of the defining moments or the prime period of their lives.

But i feel that if i m ever gonna be able to live out this calling to impact them. I really gotta take up the cross and deny. Two really key words. Cross and deny. Both i realise, i m not entirely good at. Cross -> loving God and loving people. the burden of doing so, has never been one thats occurred to me. thats why my social circle is large but my inner circle is minute. my self formed busy schedules and fatigue always take me away from spending time with God. Deny. the things that i really like, keeping my cash to myself, certain pleasures that i constantly struggle with, lust, yes masturbation. i know they always rob me from my anointing, my power and my purpose. it seems like every time i engage in something i shouldnt be doing, i feel weak and restless after. then it leads me to my inability to do the former [Cross] and its all a vicious cycle.

but i listened to the song. and these lyrics remind me.
"Surrendered completely,
I find that I'm free
All that this world can hold
Will never hold me."

there is hope yet :)

"But above all these things put on love, which is the bond of perfection. And let the peace of God rule in your hearts, to which also you were called in one body; and be thankful. Let the word of Christ dwell in you richly in all wisdom, teaching and admonishing one another in psalms and hymns and spiritual songs, singing with grace in your hearts to the Lord. And whatever you do in word or deed, do all in the name of the Lord Jesus, giving thanks to God the Father through Him."
-Colossians 3:14-17

|cowpoo| 11:29 AM|

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